OnePeople has no plans to visit hipster hangouts, but it's nice to know that superfuturecity can help us find them.

The Brooklyn Eagle archives are now online:

Founded in 1841 by Isaac Van Anden and Henry Cruse Murphy, the Eagle was published as a daily newspaper for 114 consecutive years without missing a single edition. The newspaper, which was originally conceived as a temporary political forum for the 1842 election, ironically lived the longest and absorbed all other Brooklyn daily papers except the Brooklyn Citizen. At one point the Eagle actually became the nation's most widely read afternoon newspaper. Unusual among major metropolitan daily newspapers of that time period, the Eagle chronicled national and international affairs as well as local news and daily life in Brooklyn. As a result the Brooklyn Daily Eagle provides a window into Brooklyn's past, as well as documentation of national and international events that shaped history. The Eagle played a vital role in the community of Brooklyn's self-identification as separate and even better than Manhattan. Brooklyn existed as an independent city until the consolidation with New York City in 1898. Conceiving and promoting the building of the Brooklyn Bridge, the Eagle took an active role in developing the bridge a symbol of Brooklyn's pride. The paper also coined the phrase describing Brooklyn as "the borough of homes and churches." With offices in Brooklyn, New York, Washington, Paris and London, the Eagle became one of the borough's greatest institutions. Distinguished editors of the Eagle included Walt Whitman, Thomas Kinsella, St. Clair McKelway, Cleveland Rogers, and Frank D. Schroth. The rise and fall of the Eagle coincided with the economic development in Brooklyn. The paper folded in 1955 because of a prolonged strike called by the New York Newspaper Guild. At the time it closed it employed 681 people and did an annual business in the sum of approximately $6 million.

The Sims Online is a multiplayer online world where participants shepherd their virtual "Sims" through life. They need to get jobs, fall in love, go to the bathroom, and get along with the Sims around them. It's just like your real life, but you can do it from your chair. One of the operating principles of the virtual world is that there is no established government or police force -- the Sims have to keep themselves honest. Inevitably, some players decided to rob and steal. This makes the game more interesting, but the law-abiding Sims had to form a response. The most popular Sim, Mia Wallace, organized the Sim Shadow Government. With about 160 other players, they made sure that the other Sims operated under the rule of law. Students of political science know what happened next. The Shadow Government devolved into corrupt syndicate, extorting other players and running protection rackets. Competing syndicates have been formed. The full story is at the Mercury News. The assassination euphemisms are particularly fun to read about. Some SimRICO statutes should appear soon.

In this Sunday's City section of the New York Times, the editors are asking readers which books are the new New York classics. We here at OnePeople encourage each and every one of our loyal readers to nominate Winter's Tale by Mark Helprin. Once you have read it, the book will inform everything you do as a New Yorker. But don't take our word for it, Benjamin De Mott said as much on the front page of the New York Times Book Review:

"Is it not astonishing that a work so rooted in fantasy, filled with narrative high jinks and comic flights, stands forth centraally as a moral discourse? It is indeed....I find myself nervous, to a degree I don't recall in my past as a reviewer, about failing the work, inadequately displaying its brilliance."

We here at OnePeople can't think of higher praise, or a book more suited to being one of the "new New York Classics." So how can we make sure Winter's Tale gets the attention it deserves? You can start by commenting on this story, or mailing OnePeople directly, and we'll make sure that it ends up on the City editor's desk. Pass this message along to all your bookish friends, too -- we need all the help we can get.

This is somewhat afield of the usual OnePeople fare, but we're living with a former Henson employee so we're delighted to report that the Jim Henson's family has bought Kermit back from the German licensing company / criminal organization EM.TV. EM.TV is the film rights arm of KirchMedia, and was a star of Frankfurt's now-defunct Neuer Markt exchange when it bought the Jim Henson Company from the Henson family. After a time, the Haffa brothers who ran EM.TV were found to have decieved their investors and inflated EM.TV's stock price. There are reports that the brothers can't even walk down the streets in Germany for fear of being assaulted by investors. EM.TV tanked, and a furious bidding war began between a number of companies, including Disney and Sony, for control of the Henson properties. In the end, the family was able to buy the company back for US$89M, a far cry from the US$690M that it sold for in February 2000. Don't think that the family suddenly made half a billion dollars, though -- much of initial deal was in EM.TV stock, which is now less than worthless.

Here are some common turns of phrases translated from Farsi..... Man-uh chap chap negah nakon. literally: Don't look at me left-left means: Don't give me that look Zameen khordam, pedaram dar omad. literally: I ate the ground and my father came out. means: I fell and it hurt like hell. Eingushtam khord, sedam dar omad literally: My finger ate, my voice came out means: I hit my finger and I hollered. Havod roh doram literally: I have your weather/air means: I'm looking out for you Khoded roh beh koochehyeh Ali chap nazan. literally: Don't hit yourself to Ali Left's street means: Don't play dumb. Yeh tockmee doreh megzoreh. literally: He's planting an egg means: He's up to something. Pedar sookhteh literally: Burnt father means: Little rascal Chesmam ob nemeekhoreh literally: My eye doesn't drink water means: I really doubt it Cheshmam roshan literally: My eye is bright means: "I'm happy to see you" or "Lucky me (often used sarcastically)" Cheshmed zadand literally: They hit your eye means: You got done in by the evil eye Obeh rooham reekht literally: The water of my face spilled means: I got embarassed Takhleefam rof rosham kon literally: Light my assignment means: Let me know what's going on. Mooh as gardaneh moh koloftareh literally: Hair is thicker than our necks means: We're pretty easy going Befamee nafamee literally: you understand, you don't understand means: so-so

We are not making this up. The Pentagon is begging the public to stop sending flea and tick collars to troops in Iraq. They appreciate the sentiment, "but the fact is that flea and tick collars are not approved for humans and in fact are quite detrimental to the skin. Our skin is different from that of dogs, and the pesticides tend to burn our skin," says Army Maj. Dwight Rickard, contingency liaison officer for the Armed Forces Pest Management Board. This isn't just a case of well-meaning but mentally challenged citizens: a 1999 Rand survery discovered that about 20,000 personnel used flea and tick collars in the first Gulf War, and linked their use to some symptoms of the Gulf War syndrome. Everyone head over to the Darwin Awards and make an appropriate submission.

Thanks to Dahlia for this Agence France-Presse piece with a revealing insight into the lives of the Iraqi secret police. The Mukhabarat, tasked with quashing any "careless whispers", had a particularly "hard day" after being tomahawked by the United States. They quicly left their "battlestations", "praying for time". In addition to their "father figure", the US found a number of posters on the wall. Among them: "mother's pride" and "love machine" George Michael. Nothing looks the same in light.

Joshua Marshall of Talking Points Memo is being interviewed by my main man Aaron Brown on CNN at 11:30p EST tonight. Update: Imagine my disbelief and profound disappointment when our Man from Minnesota got to Today's Papers without a mention of Mr. Marshall. Instead, some super-blinky expert on training constabulary. But wait! The plot thickens! TPM says he cancelled on short notice. We're trying to imagine a set of circumstances under which you could not appear on CNN, but could still update your blog...